As we approach the shortest day of the year I become reflective and quiet. Thinking of this past year, of all the great soapers and creatives in the Facebook Sorcery Creations group, all of you who have believed in Sorcery Soaps and invited my version of magic into your homes - I feel incredibly grateful. You are my friends. Maybe not stop-by-for-coffee friends, but still, friends.
When Sorcery Soap began a few people who I considered friends had surprising things to say about my soap making adventures. One told me they hated "crafts" and that she wasn't crafty. When I mentioned I started an Instagram page she said, "who's really going to follow soap?" Someone else said, "I don't use bar soap" so refused to accept my gifts. All this, as if my ideas had anything to do with them. Not one asked if I was happy making soap, peaceful, curious... In anyway, satisfied.
With great generosity in my heart and delight at my new found abilities and passion, I had gifted many of those same people soaps. Maybe not pretty, but certainly successful healthy soap. I had known these people for years. My desire for understanding, balance, seeking my truth and researching the healthiest options over the years had not impacted them at all.
The one person who has believed in me, never doubted, and endlessly encouraged me was my man, my love, my "Shekh Ma Shieraki Anni ("My Sun and Stars" in Dothraki)". He gave me a small amount of money to begin my experiments, thought I could make soap while I spent a year watching videos and asking questions, reading soap recipes and listening patiently to my endless excitement about my new passion. He watched some soap videos with me. As you can guess, he was kind, albeit, a bit bored. Not one time did he question my desire to learn, understand and research. He knew. He knows how much I like reading and investigating any subject and when I get my teeth into something I rarely let go.
Of all those people only one person who purchased my soap - my ex-husband. He didn't have to, I would have given him whatever soaps he wanted. He insisted. He said, you spent your time. He saw value in my time spent.
He and I had been married for many years, friends before and after our marriage. He wanted to support me and for the first time, purely free of ego and self-importance. It healed something between us. His purchase, (even asking for more) which was enough to encourage me. Just that. A man who had known me since I was just 23 years old (a lifetime ago) seemed to know how important this was for me.
Through soap I have met many amazing people. People who have stood for me, supported and encouraged me, overtly or simply by being kind. I have lost "friends," realized more clearly who is important and who can see me - who can see my mind's manifestations and don't shy away.
Revealing one's creativity to those close would seem safe - friends - and showing strangers new creations would seem to make one vulnerable. I found the opposite. I have made greater and deeper connections from people all over the world, revealed my truer nature and found that to be a greater gift than to show that part of myself to those who I thought knew me. It was a massive rethinking, a shift and cleaning out of the old to embrace the new.
Cheers to all the new and possible soap friends! Cheers to your holiday with those who really do know you and those who you have yet to meet. Happy Holidays!